The drought.

You can know someone for a long time and not really understand one another or have a great understanding of why they are, how they are. I’ve had this feeling with my eldest sister for as long as I can remember. Separated at 12 (for me) and 15 for her, due to unforeseen circumstances. For the first time in 12 years we had the opportunity to reconnect and understand one another. To catch up on what we had missed out on for the past 12 years, filling in all the gaps. The spaces. The unsure, uncertain and unclear areas of our life.

We learnt to laugh and cry together again. What it was to be best friends. To have almost every moment together for two weeks. I learnt that quality time is invaluable. I already knew this, but our holiday together really taught me something new. I miss my big sister. I miss having those close to me, physically close. Being able to trust a really cool chick who I have always looked up too and been envious of her forced courage.

For those who don’t know me, I come from quite a big family. And for those of you who do, perhaps don’t know quite how big. My immediate family are far from being close in proximity. Separated across three states and territories. I remember growing up and wishing that we could all just be together, to have the time and memories together instead of in stories and needing to explain your day and situations over the phone or facebook.

Although you can maintain a good relationship via the use of technology, it doesn’t fill or equate to a real connection. There’s something that gets missed. Something you can’t touch or understand. Being happy, sad and indifferent without the other person physically being there, is really hard.

The funny thing is, I’ve always had this relationship with my family. We’ve always been so spread out and separated by roads, mountains and long rivers. It wasn’t until I got this one-to-one time, alone with my sister that it all made sense to me. All the phone calls, FaceTime, hand-written letters, facebook and instagram tags could never give us quality time. To look into the eyes of someone you love and care about so much and be able to just hug them, laugh with them and feel like you belong.

I realised that although technology helps, it can never replace that sense of togetherness.